I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
