is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
