i don't like sucking hair
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize
