I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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