im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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