Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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