i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
