But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Randomize
