did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize