he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
So apparently I’m into choking now
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
