you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Are we still banned from the library?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
