dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
