I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
