And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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