My friends, they love my intelligence
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
