u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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