It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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