I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize