He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
