This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
