I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
