there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
