im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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