Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
