I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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