so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
