One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
operation harelip BJ is a go
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
