Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Randomize
