no. you can't hotbox the world.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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