My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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