one word: firstdatebathroomanal
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Randomize
