my mouth tastes like poor choices
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
