Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Randomize
