CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
