i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I will be naked everywhere
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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