I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
