And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
