Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Randomize
