i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
