I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
