Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
