can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
