I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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