i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
