FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
