Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
