names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize