her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Randomize
