Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
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