He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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