I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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